Don't take it personally

Keith Haring has a new job

In Art on August 12, 2012 at 9:08 pm

Keith Haring has a new job. He designs T-shirts for Spanish clothing company Zara.

I can see you frown. I can see you and all your insecurities hit Wikipedia because you were certain Keith Haring was that artist who drew those funny little men in yellow, red and blue, and who died of Aids years ago. I can see you sigh with relief when you read in Wikipedia that indeed, Haring was that artist who drew these funny little men in yellow, red and blue and died of Aids years ago. 1990 in fact. Damn it, how time flies. Am I that old?

Yes. You are that old when you know that. Because our adolescent waiter who brought us all these neon coloured yummy cocktails on Saturday night didn’t have a clue who Keith Haring was. He was wearing one of his T-shirts though. He knew that much. Mainly because it said K. Haring on the bottom, below a picture of the unfortunate artist who, to young people nowadays, looks like a hipster with his oversized glasses. “He’s just designed them for Zara, he did a whole line”, waved our smug little shit with the smooth olive coloured skin, the pretty teeth and the head full of curly hair.

“I’m pretty sure he didn’t considering he’s been dead for years.”

“Oh…………………… erm………………. I actually don’t know who he is.”

Gasp.

“He’s a famous artist, you should google him.”

“Oh right… So this must be his face on the shirt. OMG, that is SO coooooool.”

As he tugged on his shirt, trying to turn his head upsite down to inspect the hipster’s face on it closer, I wanted to say: But how can you not know? Madonna even mentioned him in her documentary Truth or dare. I swallowed my words. I could just about imagine how THAT  conversation would go.

“Madonna?”

“Yes. Famous artist. Madonna. Elderly woman who flashed her titty during a concert in Turkey last month. She’s dating a guy your age. M.a.d.o.n.n.a. Lady Gaga built a career copying her. Yes. That one.”

So I kept my mouth shut, ordered another cocktail and gave him a huge tip. I hear H&M do a nice Rolling Stones T-shirt line that he would just love.

Practice what you preach

In Books, Philosphy, Politics on August 12, 2012 at 2:56 pm

The Tea Party is not only hitting everyone around the head with the Bible, they’ve also once again, dusted off Ayn Rand’s legacy. Particularly Atlas Shrugged, the capitalist’s Bible.

But the Tea Party politicians are essentially doing to Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged what they are doing to the Bible. They pick passages and twist them so they become an argument to whatever law and regulation they propose, conveniently ‘forgetting’ everything else in both books that state the complete opposite.

In Atlas Shrugged, Rand creates a utopia and dystopia to promote her ideas of laissez-faire economy, a virtually non-existent government, the responisibilty citizens have to make something of their lives and the freedom of individuals to lead the life they want while others abstain from interfering.

Rand’s hero’s need to fight against powerfull enemies, as there are meddling governments, parasites (poor people on welfare), altruism culture, religion and business men like James Taggart who run businesses into the ground because they are incompetent buffoons who enjoy the protection of their peers and government. It is an extreme and long essay against socialism, religion, lazyness, welfare and government interference and for individualism, industrial growth, science, free market and – in my controversial opinion – women’s rights. Rand completely disregards reality to get her point across, but they call it utopia/dystopia for a reason. Those don’t exist in real life.

How ironic that today’s moguls and Tea Party members identify themselves with the protagonists in Atlas Shrugged, when they are so obviously more alike the character James Taggert c.s. The whiney snobs who cry free market whenever it suits them, but call for regulation if the free market turns against them, most of the time because they make the wrong decisions that will ultimately not only destroy their companies, but also the entire economy (looking at you, bankers). Taggart runs his company into the ground, then turns to the government for help (again, looking at you, bankers).

Ayn Rand was a pro-choice atheist who preached freedom and responsibility of individuals. So the Tea Party, who holds the Bible in one hand, and Atlas Shrugged in the other, is one hypocrite MOFO. It is hypocricy to use the Bible AND Ayn Rand’s legacy at the same time for your goal. You can not be against government imposing taxes on companies while using Ayn Rand’s idea of a non-interfering government for your argument, when on the other hand you campaign to strip women and homosexuals of their rights (birth control in all shape and form, same sex marriage) while quoting the Bible. The Bible couldn’t be further away from Rand’s legacy. It is either, or… not and.

Ayn Rand died while on welfare and medicare. The woman who preached against altruism and welfare for years, needed the help of her peers when she was weakened by lung cancer. She accepted it, albeit most likely, because it was a choice between life and death. By this, she proved herself wrong. Rational egoism is big fun until you run out of money.

Susan OBE

In Miscellaneous on December 13, 2011 at 3:11 am

I have a new obsession. I want to go to the North Pole. No really, I do. I recently saw the Top Gear Polar Challenge again and two interviews with Sir Ranulph Fiennes, the explorer and overall bad ass. I’ve decided that I too, want to push my body to the limits and go to the North Pole and be awesome.

Sir Ranulph Fiennes amputated his own fingers in his garden shed with a bit of help of Black & Decker.

Whilst traveling alone to the North Pole his sled had fallen through the ice. He grabbed hold of the sled, but that caused terrible frost bite to his fingers. At home, the doctor said some healthy tissue had to grow back a bit before he could amputate, but Fiennes got fed up waiting and decided to take matters into his own frost bitten hands.

Sir Ranulph Fiennes is the kind of person I secretly want to be, but know I will never ever hold a candle to, because of myself. Over the years I have had several of what I call obessions. Things that would make me awesome and get me knighted. Susan OBE.

When I was eight I wanted to be Evel Knievel, but my parents wouldn’t get me a BMX crossbike because I was a girl and girls get shiny red bicycles with with rubbery thingies on the steering wheel. Now, that didn’t stop me. I had loads of friends (boys) who did have BMX bikes. They soon discovered I would go to great lengths to borrow them. So, Ricky dared me to cycle down the huge concrete steps of the bank building and Toontje bet me I couldn’t jump the canal in midwinter. I would always fail miserably and after a particularly nasty incident, which ended up in my mother having to wake me every half an hour to check if I hadn’t slipped in a coma, I gave up my dream to be Evel Knievel.

Over the years I have bought skate boards, hiking gear, inline skates, ice skates, scooters, and all sorts of stuff that would make me awesome. It  never did. Because in order to become awesome you need to persevere. And I get bored, like, really really fast. I gave away my skateboard because after two days of practice I still couldn’t do a decent ollie, so I thought:  what’s the fucking point?  The hiking gear I still use, but my dream of going on really long hikes is hindered by the fact that after twenty kilometers I am bored out of my freakin’ mind and really want to go do something else. Like Facebooking, or taking a bath. Or just sit on the sofa.

Which can be quite a problem if I want to go to the North Pole. It’s all white up there. Just ice, snow and sky. For miiiiiiiiiiles… And it’s a really long walk. And rather nippy. I might just do the Dakar Rally instead.